Healthy Marriage Movie Guide-- The Astronaut Farmer

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Dreams
  • ·        In the opening scene, the dad rides in on horseback, wearing an astronaut suit. He dreams about going into space, it has been his hobby and dream since he was a small boy. What sacrifices are you and your spouse willing to make for your dreams?
  • ·        “One day it’s a brick, another day it’s a bullet.” The judge orders a psychiatric evaluation. Everything is on edge and he is dead set on getting his rocket in the air. What crazy places have your dreams taken you?
  • ·         “They used to tell me I could do anything I wanted to do. Maybe I’m insane, but I still believe that. I believe that with all my heart. Somewhere along the line we stopped believing that. If we don’t have our dreams, we don’t have anything.” What are your thoughts on this?

Ambition/Dedication
  • ·        Charlie is walking through the school and the nurse is following him. He goes and gets Shepherd from his class and says he needs his engineer. Everyone is shocked. “I’m sorry, you are just teaching him history, I’m going to help him make history.” Are you confident in your pursuits? Do you include your spouse in your pursuits?
  • ·        Farmer and their astronaut dinner guest have a heart to heart in the command center trailer.  Some situations in life we have the opportunity to really look within ourselves, what we care about, what we feel. Do you have heart to heart conversations with your spouse?
  • ·        Charlie’s father-in-law tells him that he is a great father, “This man couldn’t even get his family to eat together.”  Do you know the things that you are doing right in life, in marriage, in your family? Try listing things that are going right and that you are doing right.
  • ·        “You can’t give up, you can’t give up.”  Does dedication only go so far? What do you think about “not giving up”?

Love
  • ·        “Where’s your wedding ring...in the capsule somewhere? ..ugh”. Is the wearing of your wedding rings important to you? What symbolizes marriage to you?
  • ·        Farmer is dancing with his wife at the fair. “Thank you…for this”. What activities do you like to do together?
  • ·        The family is heading to church and Charlie comes over and tells his wife that she doesn’t have to leave. “So I don’t get bitter and call you an ass for lying to us.” How do you work on forgiveness?
  • ·        “Well, what man doesn’t want his space? …I see how the girls look at you. They adore you, they love their daddy who wants to go into space…” She is pushing Charles to keep trying, to start again on this crazy, wild dream. Share with each other one to two things that you have learned from being married or changed your opinion on since being together.
  • ·        “Please don’t break my heart.” “I won’t”. Is there space in your relationship to communicate your feelings?


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Struggles
  • ·        “Bet is he will never do it, or your husband will blow himself up.” Have you ever been embarrassed by the things that your spouse does or is interested in? Have you ever felt like your marriage is on the forefront of everyone’s minds, as this “astronaut” is?
  • ·        6 mortgage payments, $50,000 to get the 10,000 pounds of rocket fuel. “It’s an emergency”. How are your finances? Do you and your spouse know how to budget?
  • ·        “What’s going on? Why aren’t the kids in school?” The space program…. “Bye Phillis.”… Would you trust your spouse to this kind of extreme?
  • ·        “We are a normal family. We need to go tell everyone that it isn’t true.” “We just need to show them”.  How do you feel when you are misunderstood??
  • ·        “Just promise me you’re not going to do something stupid.”  Charles “launches” his rocket on his own, without the assistance of his son, without full preparation. What failed attempts have you had in your marriage? Where have you failed and had to get back up and try again?

Friendship
  • ·        The federal bureau of investigation…. “They can do whatever they want as long as they think you are a threat to home land security.” He is seeking advice from a friend.  The news reports come in. Who other than your spouse can you go to for advice?
  • ·        The card is declined at the store and the heated discussion starts at dinner. “You have to keep us safe…you are going to lose everything Charles, including your family”. Do each of you feel safe and secure with each other?

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